Chapter 309: Date night with Mr. Medina… CANCELLED! Courtesy of a Cat’s wake.

(The Wake goes on through)

Dean leaves.

While watching him out the window, Rory sees Mr. Medina at her door.

RORY: Mom? Isn’t that —

Dinah: *Coming out for some fresh air* It’s like a stuffed up room in there. Wow! *Suddenly catching sight of Mr. Medina* Wha- Oh… you’ve got to be kidding me. Please tell me that i’m not seeing what it is that i’m seeing at the doorstep of your house, Lorelai.

LORELAI: Oh, no.

Elizabeth: *Walking out* Hey… Where did those two new girls go? *Spotting Mr. Medina* What the…

Lorelai: *with a blank stare for the first moment* …

RORY: That’s Mr. Medina.

LORELAI: Tonight’s Thursday!

Dinah: Well… that’s something we could have gathered off the top of our heads. But question is… What that guy doing here? Are my daughters in trouble?

Elizabeth: Or could it have something to do with my daughter Leslie? *Worried*

RORY: Well, am I in trouble? Did the school call or something?

Dinah: We wouldn’t think so, Rory. The school didn’t call… They just kept on the vice grip and trying to push for our kids to drop out. Yeah right. Like that’ll ever happen. Plus… don’t worry about that school. They won’t dare push you out. Not without us having a say about it.

LORELAI: No, no you’re great. I — um — let me just come back in just one second. *To Dinah* Good fortification, Dinah. That’s really assuring.

Dinah: Anytime. besides…you guys are like really close to my girls and family… Buds stick together, Remember?

Lorelai: Yes they do.

RORY: Wait — what’s going on?

LORELAI: Let me tell you in a minute.

RORY: Tell me now.

LORELAI: Max is here —

RORY: Max?

LORELAI: Max is here to pick me up.

RORY: Pick you up for — oh.

LORELAI: I’m gonna go talk to him real quick and I’m gonna be right back.

(Rory looks upset. Lorelai runs outside and over to her own porch where Mr. Medina is still knocking.)


MR. MEDINA: Oh, hi.


MR. MEDINA: I was knocking but no one answered.

LORELAI: I know. I was at the neighbors’ house.

MR. MEDINA: You’re cancelling.

LORELAI: I know it’s totally last minute.

MR. MEDINA: I’m heartbroken.

LORELAI: I just completely forgot about our date.

MR. MEDINA: And forgettable.

LORELAI: No you’re memorable. I’ve been memorabling all week. It’s just — We had a little emergency.

MR. MEDINA: Rory, is Rory OK?

LORELAI: No, Rory’s fine. It’s the neighbors’ cat.

MR. MEDINA: The neighbors’ —

LORELAI: — cat. She died.

MR. MEDINA: She died.

LORELAI: This was a very fat, very beloved cat.


MR. MEDINA: Lorelai. I like you but I don’t want to force something on you that you don’t want so — (walks away)

(Lorelai runs after him.)

LORELAI: No, no, no. Wait. No, Max, you’re not forcing anything on me. I am telling the truth about the cat.

MR. MEDINA: Lorelai.

LORELAI: Please don’t read that much into this. Call me and we’ll reschedule. I promise that’s what I want.

MR. MEDINA: You’re sure?

LORELAI: Cross my heart and hope no other neighborhood pets die on that day.

MR. MEDINA: OK, I’ll call.


MR. MEDINA: Sorry about, uh —

LORELAI: Cinnamon.

MR. MEDINA: Cinnamon.

(Mr. Medina gets into his car and drives away.)

LORELAI: Stupid cat! You couldn’t have held on one more day?

(Cut to the wake.)

SOOKIE: Is that meatloaf?

LUKE: Uh-huh.

SOOKIE: You use ketchup?

LUKE: You gonna make fun of my mother too?

SOOKIE: Sorry. You know, my real-fruit puffs would compliment that dish quite well.

LUKE: It’s fine on its own, thank you.

SOOKIE: Right.


LUKE: OK, toss some on the plate.

SOOKIE: Can I make a pretty design, maybe make some layers?

LUKE: Sookie!

SOOKIE: Right. Tossing them on. Got it.

(Lorelai comes back in.)

LORELAI: You guys, have you seen Rory anywhere?

LUKE: Yeah, I think she headed that way. (points)

LORELAI: OK, thanks.

(The grocery store employee from earlier approaches Miss Patty.)

EMPLOYEE: Excuse me, ma’am?

MISS PATTY: Well if it isn’t Kirk the jerk.

EMPLOYEE: I want to apologize for what happened at the store yesterday.

MISS PATTY: I’m listening.

EMPLOYEE: I wasn’t aware that you were THE Miss Patty. The owner tells me that you’re one of our best customers and you can put anything into that mouth that you want to. Those were his words. I could have paraphrased them.

MISS PATTY: Stop sweating. And close your pores, Kirky, I always forgive.

EMPLOYEE: Thank you.


(Lorelai fins Babette in the kitchen cleaning out a cabinet full of pill bottles.)

LORELAI: Hey, Babette.

BABETTE: Oh, hello, sugar. Can I get you something?

LORELAI: No, I’m fine. I’m looking for Rory.

BABETTE: Oh, I think she might be in the bathroom.

LORELAI: Thanks. (starts to leave then stops) Can I help you with something?

BABETTE: Oh, no. I thought I’d just get some of this stuff packed away.

LORELAI: It’s like a scene from a kitty version of ‘Valley of the Dolls.’

BABETTE: Yeah. You never realize how old they actually are ’til you look in the medicine cabinet.


BABETTE: These were for her heartworms, for her thyroid, her kidneys, for the rash she got from taking these, and these were for the tic she developed from the stuff for the rash. And these — oh jeez, these are mine. Damn, I’m gonna miss that old broad.

LORELAI: I know.

BABETTE: You know, I don’t know what I’m gonna do with myself now. You live to take care of your kids.

LORELAI: I know, sweetie, but you gave her everything that you had.

BABETTE: I know. She was so tiny when I got her. She could sleep in my shoe.

LORELAI: The other day I came across a hat that I made for Rory. It was like a doll hat.

BABETTE: Oh, they grow up so fast.

LORELAI: And then they take your clothes.

BABETTE: I guess eventually you have to move on. Figure out what your life is going to be when you’re not busy taking care of somebody else. Jeez, look at this place. Not a clean glass in sight!

LORELAI: Let me help you with that.

(They start to wash the glasses but the sink is too low for Lorelai. Babette gets a stool for her.)

BABETTE: Here, sugar, use this. Morey sits on it when he helps me.

LORELAI: How does Morey get around in here?

BABETTE: Oh, just fine. He had a couple of concussions his first year here but he never complains. He’s just the best thing. I don’t know what I’d do without him. (voice breaks)

LORELAI: Oh, Babette. What do you mean ‘without him’?

BABETTE: I saw on Oprah a few weeks ago. She had on couples who lost a child. Most of the marriages went belly-up for the pain of it all. Even though they loved each other.

LORELAI: Babette, that is not gonna happen to you.

BABETTE: I never thought a man would ever even want me.

LORELAI: I know the feeling.

BABETTE: Oh, please, with that ass? Gimme a break.

LORELAI: I mean want me for more than my ass. Me — for me, the whole package. Annoying neuroses and all.

BABETTE: You’ll find him. It might even be that stud who drove out of here in a Mustang.

LORELAI: Did you see him?

BABETTE: Yeah, what a jaw.

LORELAI: He’s got a great jaw.

BABETTE: How is he in the sack?

LORELAI: I haven’t even gone out with him yet.

BABETTE: Will you tell me when how he is when you do?

LORELAI: I’ll call you during the cigarette.

(They hug. Lorelai hits her head on a low-hanging overhead lamp. They hear [iano music from the other room.)

BABETTE: Oh — that’s Cinnamon’s song.

(Cut to the living room. Everyone is seated or standing quietly listening to Morey playing the piano. Miss Patty is beating on a drum. Babette goes over to sit with Morey. Lorelai finds Sookie in the crowd.)

LORELAI: Oh I can’t find Rory anywhere.

SOOKIE: I’m sure she’s around.

LORELAI: Max showed up for the date that I forgot about and she saw him.

SOOKIE: And you haven’t told her.



LORELAI: Stop with the ‘oops.’

SOOKIE: OK, calm down. It’s not that big of a deal.

LORELAI: Her teacher showed up on her porch to take out her mother.

SOOKIE: She’ll understand. You’re crazy. She knows that.

LORELAI: Enough with the comforting, Sookie.

SOOKIE: Sorry.


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