(The Afternoon at Chilton… First day of hell at a close. “Take us home. We beg you” Rhapsody and Burke to Dinah and The Burke’s.)
(Metropolis life takes the first.)
At Lorelai’s house…
Babette and Morey, Lorelai’s next door neighbors, are sitting in their front yard. Lorelai pulls up and gets out of her Jeep…
BABETTE: Oh, Lorelai, I’m so sorry I had to call you like this.
“Lorelai and Rory’s next door neighbor. She’s known for her raspy voice, her frequent mentions of her husband Morey and a penchant for making inappropriate comments. However, she means extremely well and has a sweet heart. She is protective of Lorelai and Rory and cares about them very much.”
LORELAI: Oh, that’s okay, Babette. I appreciate it.
BABETTE: All of a sudden, they pull up, get out of the truck, and start sniffing around. It’s very strange.
LORELAI: All right, let me go talk to them.
MOREY: Tell her about the gnome, baby.
BABETTE: They kicked the gnome.
BABETTE: Right in the head.
MOREY: That’s just not cool.
LORELAI: I’m very sorry. Is the gnome okay?
BABETTE: Oh, he’s fine, sugar, thanks for asking. But I wouldn’t trust these boys. Gnome kicking says a lot about a man’s character.
LORELAI: Yes, well, I’m gonna go take care of this. Thanks.
Lorelai walks over to her house where two men are walking around on the porch…
LORELAI: Hey. Um, what are you doing?
MICK: You live here?
LORELAI: Yes, I do.
MICK: I’m supposed to install a DSL for a Lorelai Gilmore. Is that you?
LORELAI: Yes, that’s me.
MICK: I’m Mick.
LORELAI: Hi Mick, nice to meet you. Could you get off my porch?
MICK: I was told that you wouldn’t be here, but to look for a ceramic frog with a key in it.
LORELAI: I don’t understand.
MICK: We can’t find the frog.
LORELAI: I didn’t order a DSL.
MICK: *checks clipboard* Uh, the order was placed by an. . .Emily Gilmore.
LORELAI: Ugh, no!
MICK: We would’ve been done by now, but the frog search has put us way behind.
LORELAI: Well, look. . .
the other man walks over…
MAN: Hey, Mick, I found it.
MICK: You found the frog?
MAN: It wasn’t a frog, it was a turtle.
MICK: It says here it’s a frog.
LORELAI: It’s a turtle.
LORELAI: Trust me. Listen Mick, I’m afraid I’m gonna have to cancel that DSL order.
MICK: You sure? It’s already paid for.
LORELAI: Yeah, I know, but, uh, we don’t need a DSL, so thanks for coming, and, uh, you guys can just go.
Lorelai walks back over to her Jeep…
BABETTE: Is there a problem?
LORELAI: Oh, nothing Shakespeare couldn’t turn into a really good play.
Back at Chilton…
Rory was relentlessly trying to get through to Paris and begging that she would be allowed to help her redo the project. However… That was becoming a bit of a problem. There was gonna be a snag as Paris was not in anyway about to budge.
TEACHER: Let’s try another passage. “The Romanists have, with great adroitness, drawn three walls round themselves, with which they have hitherto protected themselves, so that no one could reform them, whereby Christendom has fallen terribly.” Who said this?
RORY: *sees Paris about to give the answer* Martin Luther.
TEACHER: Very good, Miss Gilmore. And what year did Martin Luther address the Christian nobility?
RORY: *again sees Paris lean forward to answer* 1520.
TEACHER: Very good, Miss Gilmore.
Teacher: Until next time, class.
Paris walks up to Rory’s desk…
PARIS: Stay out of my way. I will make this school a living hell for you. *leaves*
Leslie: *Scoffs* What?!
Blossom: *Getting up* That’s it! *Walking over to Paris and pushing her down* You get the fuck away from Rory, you snot-nosed Bitch. You come near her again… intimidating her ever again… You will be wishing that we were all just a dream. Because we will make your life here a living hell. You think that you’re tough shit? You’re gonna soon find out that you are not the only one that can play the bitch.
Janie: Charlene… *Motioning for a little frost to be dished out* What do you say we give Paris a little bitty taste of Arctic Minded hospitality? Show her what it puts out as a bit of a message. “Be careful who you mess with.”
Charlene: *Nods* … *Silently using telekinesis on Paris and forcing her to dance Broadway style against her will* Dance. Let’s see you dance like the puppet that you really are, Paris. This is where you realize… That when you mess with a super-powered persuaded member of the Rhapsody Dynasty… You’ll find yourself in a mess of trouble. Intimidation from you… mean Zero.
Leslie: *Shooting Lasers silently from her fingers at Paris* Like some light? Take that. Take that… You big vengeful creep!
Paris: *Getting up* … *Glaring at Leslie and Blossom* Watch your backs… i am gonna make this school a living hell for you. *Leaving the room*
Alex: If you try… we’ll report you. We can promise you that.
TRISTIN: See you tomorrow, Mary. *leaves* girls.
RORY: The name is Rory.
Janie: *With Alex and Charlene; sighs* …
“Psst!… Psst!… Leslie.”
Hartford HAIR SALON
Lorelai walks past the front desk…
RECEPTIONIST: Can I help you?
LORELAI: God, I wish.
Lorelai walks over to the hairdryer chairs and knocks on her mother’s hairdryer…
EMILY: What on earth. . . *lifts up the hairdryer*
LORELAI: You’re not buying us a DSL.
EMILY: Lorelai, this is hardly the place.
LORELAI: I canceled the order, and it’s not happening.
Dinah walks in pissed off…
Dinah: *Irate* I have had it with you, Emily. You’re reaching on my last final nerve. *Walking over to Lorelai* Lorelai… Woman or not… Mother or not… Just let me know where i am to lay down the hurt on her.
Lorelai: *Looking at Dinah* Dinah… Calm down. I can handle this.
Dinah: Really? *Scoffs* Can you handle the reality that i was just called from work about suspicious activity being done to my house?
Lorelai: … Huh?
Dinah: *Fuming mad* Huh?! What’s huh?! I was at work and in the middle of a Football practice drill. Instructing the guys on the football field at The bulldog stadium. I had to literally drop what the fuck i was doin’ to respond to my house. I get to my house and find that there was a service repairman. From VERIZON WIRELESS. trying to get into my house and install a DSL. Which need i add that it was not needed as my husband and I already had a DSL modem… High-speed internet built in. Had it since my oldest daughters who are now College attendees were only 6 years old. It still works pretty damn good. But now there is what i happened to find at the front door of my house. They tell me that the order was placed by yours truly… the one who feels the nerve to butt into our lives. My life. You… Emily. You want to control someone’s life. Control your damn own. My daughters are not you problem. I came to you for help getting my kids into Chilton. But in no way did i lay down the red carpet for you to come in and control my life.
EMILY: But Rory needs the Internet for her school. As did the girls.
LORELAI: We have the Internet.
Dinah: As do I. The internet we had was good enough and it never laid down any issues. It worked just as fine.
EMILY: Well, this is faster.
LORELAI: Well, we like our Internet slow, okay? We can turn it on, walk around, do a little dance, make a sandwich. With DSL, there’s no dancing, no walking, and we’d starve. It’d be all work and no play. Have you not seen The Shining, Mom?
Dinah: I have. I actually watched it the other night.
EMILY: What on earth are you talking about?
LORELAI: Also, there will be no cars, no parking spaces, and all the uniforms will be supplied by me, the mother. That’s final. There will be no discussion.
Dinah: That goes double for me. DOUBLE!
EMILY: You’re being stubborn, as usual. And Dinah… I must say that you’re coming off as very ungrateful.
LORELAI: No, Mom, I’m not being stubborn as usual, I’m being me! The same person who always needed to work out her own problems and take care of herself because that’s the way I was born. That’s how I am!
Dinah: And i am not ungrateful. I came to you. I didn’t have to. But i did and it’s starting to come to the point where i find myself regretting it little by little each passing day because of the constant meddling that you’re doing and it is truly… undoubtedly pissing me off and sending me into a state of white hot livid.
EMILY: Florence, I’m dripping.
LORELAI: I appreciate what you have done for Rory in paying for her school, That will not be forgotten. You won’t let it. But she is my daughter, and I decide how we live, not you. Now then, do they validate parking here?
Dinah: That goes for me too. Janie, Alex and Charlene are the daughters of Shingo and Me. Their mother. Not you. I will tell you this… once. And only one time. You back off from trying to control my daughters will for respect. You are not to sneak any little surprises… Nothing. All the things that they need. Will be supplied by me. And their father. No one else. Unless it happens to be from one of the family or a very close friend of the family that me or my family had known for years. So Emily… I would advise you to not push the last button of nerves on me. Because i am warning you. I am warning you here. Now. That if you even think about going ahead with trying to win my girls over and get them to choose between their parents and you… decency be damned. It won’t matter how much clout you have and it won’t matter who’s mother you are. You and I will rumble and you’ll really find out why the Hartford Press as you claim put me in a story… deemed me and pegged me as the Thunderic loose wire. I haven’t used any of my so called heroic wits and firepower in a while… But Emily… You’re pushing it. One more time of over-stepping… You’re gonna be sorry. Heed those words of warning and heed them well. One more time and the gloves are coming off. You get me? Am i coming in loud and clear? *Looking at Lorelai for a second and placing a plea of apology* Sorry Lorelai. But i have reached my fill. I am done with the games that Emily is playing. Butting in. I am starting to really see why… Seriously see why you were trying to keep where you never dealt with your parents again. For anything. If my mother was like her… i’d cut her out of my life too. *Looking back at Emily* Does this place even validate parking?
EMILY: There’s a stamp at the desk.
LORELAI: Thank you.
Lorelai walks out. Emily looks around, embarrassed…
FRONT OF CHILTON…
Lorelai is drinking coffee by the Jeep as she waits for Rory. She wasn’t the only one. Dinah was also there as well as Curtis and Elizabeth. They were all there standing beside their vehicles. Drinking Coffee and Awaiting for their daughters to emerge from the school’s inside. Rory emerges from the school…
Just seconds later… Leslie, Blossom, Betty and the Rhapsody Trio Emerge quite the same from the school’s doors and entrance…
LORELAI: Mm. Hey, you.
Elizabeth: Leslie… Oh dear girl. You’re out. How was the first day here?
Curtis: *Looking at Blossom walking over* Well… Now there’s my sparky gutsy princess. How’s the Private school treatin’ you?
Dinah: *Smiles* Hey girls…
Rory walks over, drops her backpack and hugs Lorelai…
As for the others…
Curtis: Good seeing you in one piece, Blossom.
Dinah: My rising sweethearts…
RORY: So, this whole plaid-skirt thing. . .my idea?
LORELAI: My day sucked, too.
LORELAI: Swear on my mother’s life. *starting to pull back*
RORY: Not yet.
Janie: Mom, We need to be reassured on something. The Whole plaid skirt act… Our idea, or was it a wild experimental idea gone awry?
Dinah: My day was crappy and mortifying at best.
Dinah: On the life of the annoying antics of one Emily Gilmore. *Starting to let go*
Charlene: Not yet. Still hugging.
Leslie: This day was a complete hell in sheep’s clothing.
Elizabeth: Rough day?
Leslie: Oh yeah… But did you really need to ask? Where would you inquire me to start off?
Curtis: How was it, Sweetheart?
Blossom: Spare yourself on asking for the details. Don’t ask. Please… don’t ask. *Feeling herself about to collapse* The people who dwell here are vicious.
Curtis: *Sympathetic* Owww! Oh honey… It was that harsh… huh?
Blossom: You don’t really want to know… do you?
Curtis: I’ll take that as a cue to spare the tense report. Not to ask unless i want a reason to be cross. Right?
Blossom: How’d you guess.
LORELAI: *To Rory* Ooh, still hugging, still hugging.
They pull apart…
Lorelai: So, I brought us some coffee.
RORY: Why, I’m shocked.
LORELAI: Triple caps, easy foam.
LORELAI: And if that doesn’t work, we’ll stick our fingers in a light socket. Come here. *picking up Rory’s backpack and staggering under the weight* Wow. What, do they expect you to get smart all in one day?
RORY: Oh, they expect a lot of things.
Dinah: *To her daughters* I got you girls coffee. It’s in the car. Cappuccino’s and with extra foam and whipped creme’. Something to lift your spirits up after a long and seemingly grueling day.
Janie: Thanks. It’s surprising as we are not all that worn out… Just rather tense. but it’s all courtesy of a vicious girl that we encountered in school. She’s got a sincere unhinged attitude in her that just won’t Ice down its furnace.
Alex: She was also trying to intimidate Rory… Which of course pushed us… or pushed Charlene, Blossom and Leslie to dish a little taste of their abilities. Super ability…
Dinah: Oh my… Charlene… You… Tell me that you didn’t do it.
Charlene: I didn’t want to resort to it. I was trying to hold control and refrain from stooping to that level. But… that girl… Paris. Paris Gellar… She was being like some over-competitive stuck up creep.
Elizabeth: Leslie, *Looking at her daughter* Tell me what happened today. Did you do something you shouldn’t have been doing?
Leslie: No. Not necessarily. Just step up to Aid Rory and stick up in her defense.
Curtis: *Noticing all the books* Oh dear… Do they expect for you to read all those books?
Blossom: This school expects alot from you. A lot. I realize that it’s only just the first day… however… There is no question to it all… They expect much from you.
LORELAI: *To Rory* Well, so tell me.
They get into the Jeep…
RORY: I don’t know. It was just one big, long, scary, tweedy, bad eight hours.
LORELAI: Add some hair spray, and you’ve got my day.
RORY: One of the girls already hates me, the guys are weird.
LORELAI: Weirder than other guys?
RORY: Yeah, they kept calling me Mary.
LORELAI: You’re kidding me. Wow, I can’t believe they still say that.
RORY: Why? What does it mean?
LORELAI: Mary, like Virgin Mary. It means they think you look like a goody-goody.
RORY: You’re kidding.
RORY: Well, what would they have called me if they thought I looked like a slut?
LORELAI: Well, they might have added a Magdalene to it.
RORY: Wow, biblical insults. This is an advanced school.
A Moment later…
Inside the Burke mini-van…
Elizabeth: What’re the kids like here?
Elizabeth: You’re kidding?
Leslie: No. I’m not. Mom… I’m serious. The kids here are vicious and undoubtedly as brutal as hell hounds.
Elizabeth: Any of them stand out?
Leslie: Yeah. Paris. Paris Gellar… She’s this high strung girl who acts in the sense that she believes that she rules the school halls.
Elizabeth: You’re kidding… Oh goodness. That’s not a nice girl.
Leslie: No. She’s not a nice person. She’s vindictive and callous. Rory answered some questions in class and it was good. Participating in class. But as soon as the bell rang… Paris got up and walked right to Rory’s desk and just came out with an ominous warning… “Stay out of my way. I will make this school a living hell for you.” She said it right to Rory. Blossom got on her though and i think that it birthed a huge smile and sense of satisfaction on Rory. She felt really fortunate. Although… on the negative side… We’ve just landed ourselves in the direct radius of Paris’s hostile personality. Worse than the red queen. “Off with their heads!”
Elizabeth: If she keeps it up… Let me know. I’ll have a chat with the headmaster. Any child who acts like the way Paris does… Has no place in a highly academic promising atmosphere.
Leslie: Mom… As much as that would be nice and put Paris in her place. No. Because doing something like that… would only enrage an already vicious and hostile intent situation that has already been stirred and prepped to begin with and all from just doing nothing but trying to get a sense of footing in the school.
Before they could right then begin to pull out and make off back to Metropolis…
O’aka: *Knocking on the window* …
Leslie: *Turning to see O’aka* … Mom. Stop the car. Fast.
Elizabeth: What… Why? What happened?
Leslie: Someone is knocking on the window here.
Leslie: *Rolling down her window* What is it? *Gasps* O’aka!
O’aka: It be me, Lass. Ye’ happen to have a message that is very important to ye’.
Leslie: From who? Hopefully it isn’t from Paris Gellar. I’ve had just about all that i can stand of her for the day. I regret the fact that i kept Blossom from decking that hostile girl good.
O’aka: Aye… Now that’s no way for the founder of the famous Blitzball stadium to be speaking. Granted that you are upset over someone riffling your feathers. You got an image to uphold. Ye’ must know that, wouldn’t you see to think so, Lass?
Leslie: You’re right. However… You don’t know what Paris Gellar is like. She’s vindictive. Vengeful. Hostile and vicious. If you don’t believe me… Ask Blossom. She’ll contest to it. Plus… The Rhapsody Trio. Janie, Alex and Charlene. They know about Paris. They had to cross her.
O’aka: I see. That’s not very uplifting to know. That will be one girl a fellow Merchant such as I wouldn’t wish to meet. Although that’s not what brings me over to find you. Ye’ lass… are about to get some much expected recognition. It’s got something to do with a Blitzball program that kept hitting a rather rough snag.
Leslie: *Pauses* Huh?! What was that? A Blitzball program… How? I couldn’t get the funding for that. The Mayor denied the petition and inquiry. 3 times. I even tried to offer some deals upon his direction and even that didn’t work. I tried going over with it and discussed it with the D.A 3 times and hoped for it to be the kind of shake-up power to maybe get the attention of the Mayor to consider granting the funding for the Blitzball program. It failed.
O’aka: Metropolis is not the one funding it. Sponsoring it.
O’aka then hands Leslie the message…
Leslie: *Reading the message* To Mrs. Leslie T. Burke…
“This letter is to inform and entrust our sponsoring reprimand to your Blitzball Program. We were informed of the processes and sacrifices that were put into the conjuring of a program that bring in a new innovative sport for Metropolis. For a new Generation of sports players and fellow fitness fostering individuals who favor extreme sports. As heard from a fellow Artist from Sweden… This is greatly creative and is to provide a brand new sport for the public. We would like to hear from you as soon as possible. To set up a sanction of business and sponsorship. We are all for this innovative dedication and integrity to provide something for the public. Let’s see this passion through to the end. Let’s meet and make it happen.
The Mayor of Topeka
and Wenifred Prince
The Topeka city Treasurer.”
Leslie: *Ecstatic and in shock* Oh… oh my god… O’aka. Thanks for the message. Thanks for the message. You’ve made my whole day. This is gonna put a smile on Wakka’s face. It’ll be making my girlfriend Blossom jump for Joy. We’ll see you again sometime, O’aka. Don’t forget that you need to send in that request to have an outlet inside the Stadium as part of the Souvenir wing. I need it by the end of this week. So i’ll know what Revenues will be part of the stadium’s Financial upbringing.
O’aka: You don’t need to worry a thing. O’aka’s got you covered. That he do. He’ll have that request in. swear it on the honor of O’aka XXIII Merchant Extraordinaire.
Leslie: Step on it, Mom. I have to get home and get to the Stadium post haste.
Elizabeth: *Nods* We’ll get there when we do… But don’t worry. We’re on the move.
To be continued…